When Weaning is a Blessing By Audrey Mendez
To say motherhood has been full of curveballs would be an understatement. It is NOTHING like I expected. I have absolutely adored every second of it, but I will be the first to say, breastfeeding was not my favorite portion of motherhood.
Don’t be alarmed, I loved that I could nourish my child with my body, I loved watching her latch and coo at “nursies”. I loved looking at her chunky legs as she drifted off to sleep following feedings. Those are some of the dearest memories I have so far.
That said, I very much felt like a prisoner. For us, breastfeeding was the center of the universe. She was never a bottle or even pacifier kid. I was the pacifier. Any time there was a need to soothe, and trust me, it was often, and I had to pull out a breast. This was not as disruptive when she was a newborn, but once we hit the 1-year and beyond mark, it became an absolute nuisance.
For over a year I was the ONLY person who could get her to sleep, to soothe her. My time out with my husband was limited because we had to work it around nursing. My time to attend to my own business was limited because, well, “nursies.” My child’s ability to soothe herself and fall asleep without nursing was non-existent. I found that she was always pulling at me, hanging on me, whining at me. Enjoying a meal; impossible, she wanted to comfort nurse. All. Of. The. Time. She was every bit the prisoner I was. Incapable of meeting her own emotional needs, and perhaps a little unsure that she could.
I finally had it. At 22 months I made the choice to wean. I knew I had to use a cold turkey method that a gentle approach was not in the cards. I also knew she would need a “reason” she couldn’t nurse. She did understand the concept of injury and Band-Aids. I used this, and put band-aids on my nipples and informed her that "nursies" had "owies" and she couldn’t nurse. She was distraught, but the visual helped her understand. Over the course of a week she was weaned.
I have never been happier! I felt like I could reclaim my body, my time, and my sanity. It opened up a world of new possibilities for both of us. She had a new found confidence! She was happy to be with her grandparents all day. She was a better eater and interested in exploring new foods. She was able to fall asleep on her own. Our co-sleeping has come to an end, and the whole family is sleeping again! We have had such a huge lifestyle transformation.
I look back on our “breastfeeding journey” with very mixed emotions. I love that we did do it, and that I almost reached my goal of doing it for two years, but I don’t mourn leaving it behind. I don’t think she does either. We are both celebrating our freedom!
---Audrey Mendez, Colorado native and local business owner. Loves red wine, stinky cheese and Dressage. Terrible dancer and all around lunatic (in her own words). Find out more about her and her natural baby product company at: www.boulderbabyco.com
*All photos in this post are courtesy of Audrey